Relapse Prevention for Alcoholics
How to prevent a relapse in recovery?
Following a significant amount of time in recovery (being sober), and actively working a recovery program in AA (the program), I found myself to be restless, angry, and super judgmental of AA and all the people in it. I was tired of listening to the same people talk about the same endless problems, the same stories, the same, blah, blah blah! I had lost that spark, that intangible something that is what some refer to as a spiritual awakening and slowly found reasons to stop attending AA meetings, stop talking to sober friends and then I just stopped one day attending to my recovery.
The disease of alcoholism is never cured, however we can arrest it if we diligently work a program. Nothing had changed with AA, nor the program, nor the people. I HAD CHANGED. I was no longer seeing the world through a new pair of glasses. My glasses had become dirty and scratched because I had not cared for them as I once had.
As I now looked through my glasses, all I could see was what was wrong with YOU! At the time I was not able to realize that all I was doing was projecting how I felt about myself, onto you. I was restless, irritable and discontent. I was completely back in my ego self however at the time only slightly aware of it.
Once we who are alcoholic have experienced the peace and serenity that comes with turning it over, also called surrendering and relying on a higher power to do for us what we can not do for ourselves, you would think we would immediately notice when we are back in self will run riot. Not the case, we forget if we are not constantly reminded.
I would tell anyone who would listen how I no longer needed to go to AA, and could not stand it for one more minute. I gave my Big Book away, because I certainly did not need that anymore either. Little by little, I forgot everything I had learned in recovery, and drinking again started to sound like a perfectly good idea, even though years and years ago I would do anything to be relieved of the obsession.
After talking to some sober friends I found out that I was not alone. Many recovering alcoholics and addicts can hit a wall in recovery. Many go back out, some do not. We need to share these feelings and get them out as soon as they start to arise, and if we have a mentor, counselor or other trusted confidant, we need to talk about it...a lot.
It is strange when I hear people say they had 11 years sober, 22 years sober, 3 years sober, and went back to the life that almost killed them. What this has taught me is that I need to keep doing what I did in the beginning. I need to first and foremost realize and remember I have a disease. It is the disease of alcoholism. It is not curable and it is not my fault, however now that I know what I have, it is my responsibility to take care of myself.
Next, I need a program of recovery that is the first and most important aspect of my life, because without my sobriety, little else matters. In a short period of time, I will lose my health, my peace of my mind, my friends, my family, my possessions and anything else of any meaning.
Today I have a new found respect for my disease and those who have long term continuous sobriety (including weekends and Holidays!) I also have respect for all of my fellowship who go out, and come back. This is no laughing matter, we can get so bungled up mentally in such a short period of time. Usually these feelings are indications that we need to do more not less. Perhaps we need to chair a meeting, help a new comer, bake cookies for our oh so boring home group! Whatever the case may be, time after time, getting out of ourselves continues to be the bedrock on which happy, contented sober lives are built.
Today, let's all take a fresh perspective on our recovery programs and get back to the basics. God, relieve me of the bondage of self so that I might do your will always, AMEN!
What are the signs & symptoms of alcoholism?
Most individuals who have problems with alcohol never actually seek treatment. The average person who knows only a little about alcoholism, may think that alcoholics are only those who have lost everything, and are living on the streets or are homeless. However, more disconcerting than many may know or want to know is that our society is filled with "functioning alcoholics". In some cases we can see the disease progression of alcoholism in the media when certain actors or sports figures are followed and reported on until they hit bottom, or in some cases die.
The "functioning alcoholics", are men and women who manage to maintain positions in life as doctors, councelors, lawyers, house keepers, actors, business owners, truck drivers, pilots, home makers, dentists and business owners, etc. Typically, we do not recognized these people as alcoholic, and would never consider them as such because they "function" in life. If they have a problem with their drinking, such as committing a driving while intoxicated offence, it is usually handle quietly with an attorney, and quickly brushed under the rug and considered just an unfortunate mishap.
That is one of the insidious things about the dis-ease of alcoholism. If our lives appear to look good on the outside, we have a hard time believing we are not in control of our drinking, and our lives. Additionally, this is one of the reasons most alcoholics have to "hit a bottom" in life, either socially or professionally before they will seek treatment. Often times this will include run ins with the authorities, loss of a job or career or perhaps divorce, etc.
Alcoholism is not having the ability to predict with any certainty what will happen each time we take a drink of alcohol
Alcoholism is feeling uncomfortable in most social settings without the aid of a drink, or many drinks of alcohol
Alcoholism promotes bad judgement, i.e.: driving under the influence, one night stands, or having intimate relationships with people you would never be with while sober
Alcoholism at work is drinking at lunch, coming in late, lack of productivity, making mistakes (this becomes life or death in some professions)
Alcoholism is hiding alcohol consumption or trying to minimize the amount consumed
Alcoholism ruins health
Alcoholism is involved with over 80% of all crimes committed
Alcoholism is not glamorous
Alcoholism is evident if one has ever experienced a "black out" and has no recollection of what they did while intoxicated
Alcoholism destroys lives, and everything in its path
Alcoholism symptoms include having an intense obsession to drink (physical craving) and the sense of comfort the drink will provide (phycological)
If an alcoholic wants to test himself (Alcoholics Anonymous), let him try to drink only one drink, and stop abruptly. If he can do that, he is probably not an alcoholic. When an alcoholic controls her drinking, she does not enjoy it. When she enjoys her drinking, she can't control it.
The Disease Concept of Alcoholism
The American Medical Association defines alcoholism as an illness or disease. Dr. David Ohlm, an expert in the field of alcoholism, has defined alcoholism as follows:
Alcoholism is a chronic, progressive, incurable disease characterized by loss of control over alcohol and other sedatives.
Chronic: Lasts a long time.
Progressive: Alcoholism goes through a series of increasing symptoms and it does not go away. It gets worse even after long periods of sobriety, and can be reactivated by a single drink.
Incurable: One can not return to normal drinking. One can return to a normal life, but only by stopping drinking.
Disease: A condition in which bodily health is impaired and interferes with the ability of the person to function normally.
Loss of control: Once the alcoholic takes that first drink after a period of being sober or abstinent, he/she can not predict with any reliability whether he/she is going to have a normal or abnormal drinking episode. Therefore, they do not control the alcohol, it controls them.
This is the major factor in defining alcoholism--can one predict their behavior every time they drink?
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