Maturity - Lack of Maturity is present in Alcoholics & Addicts

 

What Maturity Is

 

Maturity is many things. First it is the ability to base a judgement on the Big Picture-The Long Haul. It means being able to pass up the fun-for-the-minute and select the course of action which will pay off later. One of the characteristics of infancy is the "I want it NOW approach." Grown up people can wait.

 

Maturity is the ability to stick with a project or a situation until it is finished. The adult who is constantly changing jobs, changing friends, and changing mates--is immature. He cannot stick it out because he has not grown up. Everything seems to turn sour after awhile.

 

Maturity is the capacity to face unpleasantness, frustration, discomfort and defeat without complaint or collapse. The mature person knows he can't have everything his own way. He is able to defer to circumstances, to other people--and to time.

 

Maturity is the ability to live up to your responsibilities, and this means being dependable. It means keeping your word. And dependability equates with personal integrity. Do you mean what you say---say what you mean?

 

The world is filled with people who can't be counted on. People who never seem to come through in the clutches. People who break promises and substitute alibis for performance. They show up late--or not at all. They are confused and disorganised. Their lives are a chaotic maze of unfinished business.

 

Maturity is the ability to make a decision and stick by it. Immature people spend their lives exploring endless possibilities and then do nothing. Action requires courage. And there is no maturity without courage.

 

Maturity is the ability to harness your abilities and your energies and to do more than is expected. The mature person refuses to settle for mediocrity. He would rather aim high and miss the mark, than aim low and make it.

 

Emotional Immaturity - Emotional Maturity

 

Immature people may demand immediate gratification. They cannot wait. They may seem thoughtless and impulsive. They may be loyal only while you are useful. They have chaotic social and financial lives.

 

Immature adults are not children not teenagers. They are often self-centered and selfish adults. They may have little regard for others. They may be preoccupied with their own feelings and symptoms. They may demand your constant attention, sympathy and compliments. They may avoid participation if they can't have their own way or be the best. They may be obsessed with impressing people.

 

	Emotional Immaturity	Emotional Maturity
Love	Love is need. Demands affection and love but avoids any sign of "weakness" and has difficulty showing and accepting love.	Love is sharing. Fosters a sense of security which allows vulnerability and sharing. Can express love and accept expressions of love.
Emotions	Cannot handle frustration or criticism; jealous, unwilling to forgive, fluctuating moods. Temper tantrums. Fears change.	Use emotions as energy sources. When they feel frustrated, they seek solutions.
Reality	Avoids and denies bills and relationship problems which demand integrity. Seeks people to blame.	Confronts and analyzes problems promptly. Seeks solutions and chooses the best.
Give & Take	May be willing to give, but not take; or willing to take, but not give.	Gives money, time, or effort to enhance the quality of life of loved people. Allows others to give to them.
Feedback	Does not learn from experience. Good or bad experiences are caused by luck, or fate. Little personal responsibility.	Life is a learning experience. They accept responsibility and learns from feedback. Looks for opportunities. Moves on.
Stress	Avoids reality, pessimistic, angry, attacks people when frustrated. Often anxious.	Relaxed and confident in their ability to get what they want.
Relating	Dependent, easily influenced, indecisive, or snap judgments. Is not responsible for own actions or deficiencies. Hyper-sensitive to criticism but insensitive to others' feelings.	Independent or a team-worker as required; cooperative. Can experience true empathy, required for successful relationships.

 

Addiction Is Lack of Maturity

 

Anyone who is an addict can see that maturity is lacking in their life at some level. Maturity means delaying gratification, but the addict wants it now and usually does not care who they inflict their infantile wants on. One of the paramount tasks in recovery is for people to become mature and fully functioning human beings. The good news is that alcoholics and addicts are growing up daily in recovery today. People who are tired of aiming low and hitting the mark, are changing and learning how to be mature, by way of the many wonderful options for addiction treatment and recovery programs available today. These people are now giving to the world, as opposed to always taking from it. It's a beautiful thing to watch this occur.

 

Self esteem and maturity go hand in hand, one cannot be present without the other.

 

By: Lisa Marie Anderson-Director/Developer of newliferecovery.net

 

 

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